This is my first attempt to type in a poem in my blog. Though I "used" to write before, some of the feelings had "died" and I never could write again. Some of them have been "born" again that I dare to attempt again. Do give me a frank opinion if you comment!
Under the dawn eaves overlooking the moon;
The nest is still and sad,
As though it sorrows and grieves,
For many an empty lass and lad's soul.
From his quiet realm on hights,
The face in the Moon was jaded, it seemed,
Of dwelling so long in the land of dreams,
Enjoying the solitude of sleepless nights.
My Spirit gazed upon his face,
Ever so resilient, ever so proud;
And the twin sisters, hope and fear,
Told a tale of fairness and distant spheres.
Of faith shall love be born afresh;
Of faith that I shall be loved and a lover too;
Of faith after this poor soul has died;
Of faith in felicitous joy for a thousand nights.
From pain, from sorrows, from cold,
I hope of wrap within her warm arms;
Of no more a lonely night; awake,
With tingling whispers in her ears well into dawn.
What is fear, unknown, manipulated, but a curious mind?
Of battles lost or won;
Let it crawl or let it fly;
But just be here within my reach to stay!
Come along forever, come along now.
You for me, I for you. I promise you that;
Just pull me towards you, blame the wind push,
But just love me for sweet mercifulness sake.
Just keep holding me or pretend to,
As I fear my belittled nest is cold,
And now that I’ve lost my age of flying,
I fear there is nowhere left to fly to!
P.S - I'm yet to reply to the comments in my previous post and I'm yet to read and visit you guys to comment on your blog. Do forgive! My mind and time were not in tempo. Thanks!
18 comments:
Erm... why are all the poems I read in most blogs are sad? Are we all unhappy in general?
Nice poem though, even though a bit complicated because I am not in your mind to understand it all.
Keep the poetry coming.
The flow of the poem is good, but except the last para (which i think is the synthesis), I was not able to understand the rest fully.
Destination Infinity
Very nice poem! Do keep writing 'em.
Somewhere far away lies dream....
My heart in pain for it screams...
Yet the walls do bind me,
They stop me from being me...
yet I do believe , if not today
In death I will be free...
Biju, I can't say that I understand it all- but the poem seems melancholy yet somewhat hopeful. Very nice though. Do post some more.
nice but little tough.
What is fear, unknown, manipulated, but a curious mind?..i liked this one!:)
Beautiful poem seriously reminds me of Vishesh's poems :))
You both write really well atleast very different from what I usually read evrywhere
This one is melancholy...why??
I loved this poem in parts! You definitely have hit the muse just need to polish it more!
I love these lines
From pain, from sorrows, from cold,
I hope of wrap within her warm arms;
Of no more a lonely night; awake,
With tingling whispers in her ears well into dawn.
What is fear, unknown, manipulated, but a curious mind?
Of battles lost or won;
Let it crawl or let it fly;
But just be here within my reach to stay!
And then these
Just keep holding me or pretend to,
As I fear my belittled nest is cold,
And now that I’ve lost my age of flying,
I fear there is nowhere left to fly to!
Though there is an underlying sorrow in this poem.. but I do find this hopeful contrary to rest of the ppl out here.. Umm I feel that you are ready to give "love" one more chance.. how can that be melancholy ?
Do write more!
Oh yeah and I loved these lines too
From his quiet realm on hights,
The face in the Moon was jaded, it seemed,
Of dwelling so long in the land of dreams,
Enjoying the solitude of sleepless nights.
My Spirit gazed upon his face,
Ever so resilient, ever so proud;
And the twin sisters, hope and fear,
Told a tale of fairness and distant spheres.
Its a sad but lovely poem.
@shadowthrone: I'm not sad. The poem is written in anticipation. I'm sorry that I couldn't make it simpler! :-) Thanks!
Destination Infinity: Synthesis? what is that? It just went past my ears!! :-)
@ Gopinath: Thanks! I'm happy to get a comment from you...
@ Vijesh: Yeah, love is complicated. "n death I will be free..."
Reema: Thanks Reema. I'll attempt to ease my words and life next time :-)
manju: Thanks di. Melancholy was ot the purpose. Hope was!!
Brocasarea: Thanks! Is not mind a curious hopeless being?
Indyeah: Ha Ha. No melancholy - just hope of a wonderful love life :-)
Deepika: Thank you. I'm not an expert but will speak my mind. God Bless!
@ winnie: I'm honoured to get a positive comment from such a poem writer like you. Actually you and Vijesh were my inspiration in writing something like this. I'm also love struck!
Glad to know that you read the whole poem and liked a few lines. Thank you!! :-)
@amit: Thank you so much. I intended it a positive love poem and not sadness in any way. She actually loves me and maybe it will work between us "soon." :-)
whoa dont overwhelm me!
Your use of metaphor is way better than I can ever use :)
Well written... a great depiction of thought... keep it up :)
Maxim, (InoVVorX)
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