Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Maturity Blues

I really don't know whether there is an abstract theory that considers if age should be considered a factor for maturity or if there is a theory that assumes that the amount of responsibility which a person can handle can be called maturity. I safely doubt that a few years difference can define a person's attitude or approach to maturity. Seriously for me, it’s simply my myriad and infinite character traits that dictate and define my mode. I could be mindful and an "adult" one spurious moment, and pissed off, jejune and sloppy the next. I guess and very true in the olden times a man (not woman) is outlined as mature if we don't consider his infantile or adolescent idiosyncrasies till date by his material possessions or his level of education and the successes he has had in his life. Now, one thing bemuses me at times. Do women actually know that they mature at a different rate than men? I believe most women need and would desire a man as close to their age as possible, as close the men can be like their Fathers, of course not in subjective to their age but in contrast to their characters. They firmly hope that this will mean they will have more in common what they actually loved about their Fathers. They also believe that this will increase the chance they will share whatever phase of life in which they find themselves to be. But frankly speaking, if they hope to find a man the same age and with the same maturity level, then I feel sorry for them. Really sorry! I wish to intimate them to choose between the chances for common tastes, say for example - for music, movies, fashion or for common goals and a certain maturity level.

An individuals varied profile at different moments and instances in his lifetime can be such an interesting sketch of who a person really is. I usually find so many of them to be just captivating and yet sometimes down hysterical. Yeah, I know that this will sound like an old guy trying to charm younger ladies but I'm going to put it out there anyway and speak my mind. Guys mature much slower than women. The women need to accept that and stop cribbing about it. It has been true for time immemorial and nothing much can be done about it. I believe that there are four factors that be considered in maturity. Of course the first and least maturity level, children, who basically define right and wrong in terms of what an elder tells them. The next important factor is very typical of people in their teen and of course here you will find a bunch of people who tend to hold foundational beliefs with right and wrong on loyalties, commitments and dedication to their family and friends. Thirdly, my favorite is the third level of maturity wherein an individual comes to rely on societal, universal and defined ethical principles of life, such as the principles of justice, equality and empathy that impartially considers interests of all persons. Finally, the twisted- mind maturity which considers the people altered by religion, dictators and the societal cult thinking.

It’s unfair to omit the considerations of the women’s point of view. Now, they are more concerned than men with conserving good relationships with their family and friends, and with downplaying hurt (whom they care about, of course - women are women), which is the 2nd level as discussed above. But men, usually look at the moral part - impartial empathy (to all), equality and such as characterized by the third maturity factor. So by assumption women appear to reach the third and the most mature level much less often than men and are less morally developed than men.

All said and done, end of the day, maturity as I believe is, the argument that the other person must be comfortable like your own skin and be able to meet the primary family and social/community commitments expected of you. The serenity to accept what is demanded of you and the ability to change for you but the wisdom to know the difference. Confused? Even I am...

No comments: