Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Celebrating Tradition, Celebrating Life

Submitting a post under, "Traditional Knowledge, Natural Growth." 

Ayurveda is perhaps the oldest known medical system in the world. It is educed from its ancient Sanskrit roots - ‘ayus' (life) and ‘ved' (knowledge). It practices the principle of natural balance within the body and harmony with the environment and thus ensures complete physical health and peace of mind. Ensuring complete physical health is based on nothing more complex than understanding your body and the type of food one eats. Some people are full of energy, rarely fall sick and have a radiant look on their face. Some others always feel tired, fall sick always and look dull. The food habits of people and their way of life was documented and over thousands of years ago, Ayurveda was born. Soon after the 3rd century, Ayurveda enjoyed a big revolution in the form of origin of Alchemy. Physicians started using mercury and several other minerals after many trial and error processing. Medicament prepared through deriving from practice and familiarity techniques had several advantages and became much effective in very small doses. In a nutshell, Ayurveda is a knowledge derived through ages of experience that cannot make one immortal but it can provide you an excellent state of well being that feels like immortality.

In the postmodernist era, the quality and popularity of this tradition of Ayurveda lies in its, subtle yet technological approach. Its unparalleled understanding and documentation of natural law, the working of the human body, and proven treatment methods gives an edge. Perhaps that explains why Ayurveda with its natural traditions and ways still exits in the world today. In India we are lucky that many natural herbs are available easily and many of the remedies are documented. 

Today, herbal adaptogens, detoxification and rejuvenating agents, anti-arthritic, anti-inflammatory, memory enhancers, general aphrodisiacs, anti-asthmatic, anti-diabetic and scores of such quality medicament are available. Plant extracts from tuberous roots, fruits, wood, seeds, panchang, fruit rind, Bark, rhizome, husk, gum resin, bulb and dried stigma are well described in Ayurvedic literature, and further characterized in Ayurvedic pharmacopeias. There is a concept in Ayurveda that, “What helps you heal also prevents.”  Herbs effectual in treating particular conditions can also serve as “food,” so that, aimed nourishment to specific organs in the body for normal functioning systems and processes could be achieved. They can be used to maintain overall health, enhance mental lucidity, focus and calm nerves, improve digestion, boost immunity and support detoxification. It is a great way of finding out what makes people tick, and how to maximize their immunity and strengths. Modern Ayurvedic preparations are well-defined in structure and function. And stringent rules demand well-tested products under laboratory and clinical trial conditions with great efficaciouness.

Infants are particularly vulnerable to infections; that is why it is so important to protect them with targeted minerals and herbs. These help with overall growth, prevention of disease, and protection against dangerous complications. Ailments like irregular bowel movements, colic, diaper rash, vomiting, excessive crying etc have new parents worried. Now days the treatment and prevention for common childhood ailments consists mainly of Allopathic drugs such as antibiotics. There is no question that sometimes such drugs are necessary, but all too often they could be substituted by safer natural approaches. Many minerals are requisite for normal functioning of the body and are especially important during the first two years of infancy when the body is growing rapidly. The baby's weight doubles in about five months of age, and is three times by first birthday. Vital organs like the brain, heart and kidneys double in size by the time the infant is one year old. It is important that sufficient amounts of substantive and required nutrients are in-taken during this rapid growth and development.

Ayurveda has so much to extend by gentle and effective means through the use of medicinal herbs, massage oils and spices. India has more than 50000 different plant species; in which 15000 are medicinal plants. In actuality there is no end to the assortment of herbs and nutrients for children. Most herbs are dependable and very effective. It is better to buy the herb combinations as a wholesome therapy and supplements from established and reputed companies like Dabur. They can set the foundation for optimal development and overall health of your baby in the future.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

The Owl

I'm Explorer Blog Contest - Each journey in the Tata Safari Storme brings with it a different thrill.

The American Independence screamed on Thursday, July 4th and four goring holidays cut into my life. I determined myself to eject out from my home and thus plotted an adventure. An adventure to dwell on my loneliness but in a place afresh. I had heard about the singing of the birds in the watery graves of Kumarakom. I wanted to sleep with them and be lost in the vast silent voidness of the night, far-off twinkle of the stars, and the cries of the birds muffled in shadows.

I eagerly packed up my bag in the evening with a torch, some candles, a binocular, the remaining white rum, fresh towels, a wind cheater, change of clothes and a knife. Two hours later, my Tata Safari winded its way through narrow roads and took me to my destination. As night fell, the people in the small town were either in the local coconut infested toddy shops or were already abandoned on the doorsteps of cheap foreign liquor serving bars. I coaxed a spirit reeking boat owner to rent me his small boat, listened to his be-safe advises and finally landed myself in the middle of the swelling river.

By now I could barely make out distant objects; the surrounding water showed dim mistiness around and beyond it arose up a sullen glum darkness, which mystically kept moving up frighteningly closer in huge masses every moment. The few tiny stars glimmered and twinkled back at me, mocking me. I moved towards by the helm of the boat and settled myself. An owl hooted suddenly and flitted noiselessly near the water on its wings, almost flapping against me and scurrying away in alarm. It was the cry that vibrated and echoed from emptiness. It was the cry that thundered to me, rich with pain and a spirit of its own. It was the cry that beckoned me in the expanse of the silvery moon, spattering all around and softly gracing the view with an enigmatic, yet mesmerizing glow. It was the cry that rose from the interiors of my own soulfulness in that instant. It pined and screamed to unify it's sound with the deepness of eternity and the depths of that very moment, echoing against the watery grave an eery, sympathetic symphony. I pored the dark water and the shyness with which the startled creatures of the night ducked away into the water in reception to the yellowish light of my torch mesmerized me.

I now deferred to be like them and eagerly piled all my clothes on to the drier surface of the freshly cleaned boat. My mind raced with dark thoughts of slithering some things and I knew that without a clue how to swim I could simply go down, deep into the watery grave and could lie there, till water first filled up my lungs and my stomach and the bloating caused me to arise, for the laughing world to see. I held on to the rope tied onto the railing and lowered myself into the frigid water, devoid of warmth and cordiality. The silver light flew in remotely through the hollow moon. Groping on for dear life, I had the loneliness and freedom that sings. It made me light and gave my soul wings.

It all started suddenly; they started chirping together – slowly at first, and then in high pitched tones before rambling down again. Like semi aquatic and terrestrial species the massed voices of the frogs joined up in a strange four-part harmony, falling and eerily rising. Darkened leaves devoid of love collected around me. The night came alive with bird calls and in the midst of the tantrum - the din of screeches and whistles, some kind of bird whined deep into the night and the low lying leaves suddenly started shaking. I frantically searched the commotion around me and panicked. A sudden movement around my legs saw me splashing away everything around me. I had enough; my frenzied body urged itself up but halfway up the boat my footing began to slip and my legs began to shake. Fear gripped my soul as the terror reigned but somehow the future had other plans for me.

Trembling and cold, huddled around the rough towels, I fumbled with the cap of the rum in the bag and drooled the burn. The owl over the nearby tree blinked her weary eyes dejectedly, and gave me no sensible advice. I felt myself disgraced in her eyes and dried myself desperately.

Dried and pacified I lay back on the boat and lit up a smoke. I unwound into peace with the faint occasional rustle of the reeds on the bank, swaying lightly as the ripples reached it. The hardly detectable, faintly shimmering light of the stars, were asleep with downcast heads and I fell into a state of weary unconsciousness, which passed into sleep while the owl looked on.

Friday, July 26, 2013

Female Genocide: The Death of a Mother

Evan Grae Davis's video, in association with Franklin Templeton Investments which partnered the TEDxGateway Mumbai in December 2012.

Genocide is very closely related to dowry.  Except in Muslim communities, dowry is paid by the bride.  Dowry in India has come a long way from being given by the Girl's parents to the community in the historic days, to the Boy's parents in the 90's and recently in these days being deposited in the Boy's name/Joint account in a bank.  Women are usually viewed as dowry burdens, the weaker sex, and worthy of a lower social status compared to men. This has led to social and economic problems. In India, preferential attitudes towards women in general have existed for generations and affects women all their lives. Although the Indian constitution has granted women equal rights but gender inequality remains.   I suppose the war between the sexes started soon after Eve had the first bite of  the apple or maybe God started all the trouble by modeling Adam for strength and protection and Eve for gentleness and grace. Why were they opposed by the society in encouraging remarriage, supporting female education, and opposing polygamy in the older days? Why are they still to a few exceptions due to globalization coerced to wearing purdahs and hijabs? Why are they still forced to sell their morality and bodies for money to satisfy the male pleasures?

The best procedure to end the dowry system from the society is to start thinking not from the mind of our forefathers and society. When we stay in our circle of closed religions, caste and creed, we tend to follow its norms.  What we need to do is cast away the traditions and think more as humans and see others as yourself struggling to live in this world.  We are afraid of the immediate society at large in what they actually think of us.   Most young men and women do not have any notions of wanting the dowry but are simply following the age old traditions of marriage.  We as "Humans" should saw away the chains of customs and religion and encourage inter-religious, inter-caste, inter-regional marriages.  We need to do away with the spending of  hard earned money for a marriage party where hundreds come to "eat-the-biriyani-burp-and-walk-away."  What purpose does this whole exercise serve in a marriage bond if financial burden is endured by both the families resulting in a dowry demand?   Every community / caste from every region of India, be they Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Parsi including all the various sub castes, has a blatant or subtle approach to dowry/give-take during marriage, in varying degrees. It is also about time that our girls, especially the educated ones, have some consideration for their parents, put their foot down and refuse to get married to those demanding dowries. Unfortunately the pressure to be "married" is too high in India. In any event, unless our own mind sets change, nothing will ever change.

The new year has shaken our conscience, disturbed our women and daughters and instilled fear about the five young men who brutally raped a 23 year girl in a moving bus.  They are now seen as monsters, treacherous dacoits and unworthy men who deserve the noose, nothing more, nothing less.  The argument is that all men don't rape.  Really?

All men don't rape, yet men have seen to it that the multi-crore a year porno industry fanfares. And that the sexual objectification of women remains omnipresent and that rape and its various versions are made insignificant, romanticized, beamed through films, TV, hip and body grating music shows, news medias and such by beautiful looking women who appear and become sexual commodities.   Young men are continuously bombarded by a now called modern culture that sexualizes commodities and commodifies woman’s sexuality. India Inc sells products by selling the sexuality of the women endorsing the product and in a way sex is purposefully commodified. Men can buy pornography and prostitutes and even participate and peep in private freak shows. And so end of the day, men are able to satisfy a desire for sex without having to contain in the ramifications of sexually intimate relationships.  All men don't rape but they see to it that men who rape have little to fear, while the "lesser" gender who harm or kill rapists are sent to prison.  And they uphold and defend in the very culture of male supremacy, without which rape would be have been rare and maybe not exist at all. They have made sure that they support the saying, "If you are beaten, you're said to have incited it, if you're raped you're said to have invited it."  Historically they have had as soldiers the freedom to rape thousands of women in war torn countries, deny women the basic civil rights, passed laws concerning their clothes, institutionalized female dominance and inferiority, Which I believe amounts to men's metaphorically raping women and creating the circumstances that make physical and mental rape possible.

Feminist all around the world keep saying and advocating that sexes are the same.  It nudges women that they can do almost anything, go basically anywhere, say anything and wear anything.  Trust me, NO, they can't. Women will always be in sexual danger simply because many men are troubled, aggressive with problems controlling their anger, porn addicted, sexually frustrated, hooked to voyeurism, sensitive to rejection, insecure about their own masculinity and have distorted views about women and sex thanks to the glorified rape movies of the 70's and a culture known to marry off the victim to the rapist.  Women look suspiciously at every male trying to be friendly with them on the street. They don't even venture out in the streets alone in the fear that men will rape them. In 98.28 per cent of 581 rape cases registered last year, the "rape" accused were known to the victims and had been interacting with the victims in the normal course of life. It has to be understood by women that "men" don't rape women the minute they see them. The more women try to be afraid of men the more they are being targeted as weaklings. What makes them weaklings when they too have sharp teeth, hard knuckles, lethal elbows and powerful knee joints? What makes it difficult for them to use any one of them when they are being raped? Why do they need to cry out for help and waste the energy and stamina to ward off men in a typical rape scenario? The pervert in me stands to wonder why the "'Man" with an overly excited bulge in his loins does not attack and rub in his masculinity in a nearby sleeping dog?  Does he fear the sharp claws of his agile legs?  Does he fear the tart teeth on his precious maleness? Women, I believe should rise up their horizons and bolt out their inhibitions which the society has created for them.

The weaker gender got obtruded in the society to the extent that all Women are showcased in literature and even in every mythology that characterizes the thinking of groups, societies and nation as submissive, a weakling to the core. Even though the last few years have seen dramatic increases in the quad usable for women in the Indian society and women in general with the help of plausive policies and programs by the government and revoltionary initiatives by feminists and NGOs, the social impact has been considerate enough but not enough to change the views of Indian "men" in general.  One should realize that biologically the women are a stronger sex. In mordern and developed societies around the world the women when treated equally to men have outlived men, and hence there are more women than men in the world. But unfortuantely reverse is the case in India with the census declaring that there are fewer women for men in India.  Every state in India account to foetal homicide and dowry issues. Women need to stand up dusting off the age old beliefs of the society and religion to carve out strong and confident individuals, in real, actual and total control of their own lives and should be able to raise their voices demanding their rightful and peaceful existence in this world. They are instead wondering and pondering if the glass is half full or half empty.  I believe that the women in India are a disadvantaged lot not in terms of personal space and freedom but in deciding the fate of their own lives. The India's total female population of India is more than the acccumulative populations of say countries like Canada, Russia but still Indian women are afraid to walk the wide bridge and show the whole wide world that they are no lesser creatures.

The untoward female to male ratio can be explicated by the fact that women in India are still second class citizens. It is cogent evidence that, at every stage in their lives starting from their gory births, the women in general are deprived of their rights and entitlements, and singled out in a variety of ways. Who could forget the legendary Travancore (kingdom of Kerala) decision to impose tax on women for the right to cover their upper body? Who could forget that the Women had no legal or social status rights other than that educed from their stand in the family and could not inherit, except for the poor widow who was esteemed to 'use' her husband's property if there were no male heir, and had few options to support themselves? Who can forget sati? Who could forget that in the past golden era, women were just literary subjects in whom the Vishnu cult fathered narrations, the Ramayana and stories of Krishna devotional songs, with courtly love as a trope, which sported women as heroines and just simple objects and entertainments of desire?

Genocide in all forms should be thing of the past. The new generation should mediate on "all Indians are my Brothers and Sisters" from our national anthem. The Indian government should promote strategies to promote the convalescence of victims, community awareness and human rights for all persons. The continued monitoring of new born baby girls and boys to judge mistreatment as done in developed countries like USA and Europe should be implemented here and the concept of foster homes should be advocated in the best interest of the society at large. If India can spend millions of foreign currency in buying weapons of every size and whim then the least it could do is possibly deposit a fixed sum of money for every girl child born in India which could reduce female genocide. Let us all take an oath to protect our women and print out posters to be displayed in all our homes, least we forget that she is a Mother!

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Brylen Antonio Mukalamplavil

This is my new born baby. Sajini and me have lovingly named him, Brylen Antonio Mukalamplavil.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

The 11th Hour Confessions

On the threshold of my expected engagement and marriage to a soul which I proposed and which it disposed at the last hour, I'm crossing my fingers and holding my breath, not because of failure but of excitement. I'm simply not used to it and maybe I'm afraid of it. I guess she loves me and I've no qualms in inviting her into my life but I'm afraid.

You see, I'm no new to marriage. I've been married before to a lovely girl. Things had not worked out and we agreed for a mutual divorce. The year was 2000 and I was excited as now I’m of a life with a female gender. The hormones signaled yes, and I dumbly stood in front of the holy alter among a cascade of Christian orthodox Priests who sang in union and blessed us among smiles of more than a thousand people. What a day it was! A hopeful seemingly January sun cleared the sky, sang too in unison and the bright sparkling stars blessed us into a mysterious single body in our first night together.

Alas, I was a young fool. Ignorant and spoiled. Egoistic and selfish. My ex-wife was as also stubborn as never expected. I guess I hoped a submissive wife like my Sisters and Mother, which no young woman is and I failed to envision her thoughts. Thoughts which was about individuality and freedom. I failed miserably. I became the villain; I became the baddie in love; I became the villoma in our life; I became the epithelial tumor which could only be separated by the curse solution in society called divorce.

After she left me, I became half crazy, gave up my lucrative job, broke off all the glasses in the kitchen, migrated back to India and vowed never to love and trust again a female psyche. Of course I was not successful!

I've given my heart to so many girls but unlike playboys I've not lost count. My first ever love happened when I was doing my plus two (pre-degree at that time.) I watched with cupid dancing around my eyes a beautiful dark belle who used to travel in my bus everyday. The persistent cowboy in me saw giving a love letter (the only one I’ve given, yeah, those days it worked…) to her, forcibly inserted into her assemblage of college books and paraphernalia. Oh, yes, she had the twinkle in her eyes the next day and returned a letter back to me. I cannot express my feeling in this blog of what I felt; a mixture of exhilaration and an insurrection toward the daily monotony of college life. My next love life was when I was in Karnataka - Goa, met this tall beauty conscious lass whose friendship turned passionate and an obsession in the Osho fever which was fervent in our life at that time. The next crush was towards a Gulf Air air-hostess in Bahrain who fell for my romantic thoughts. A lot of seasons together we moved away. We simply moved away! The next break was my ex-wife, a pure arranged marriage which went wrong. She I fathom found a dearer human being with time. A lot of dark moments afterwards in Kochi, I fell in for an Aquarian who almost matched my madness. She was separated and the love guru who I had become by that time lectured her in reconciling with her estranged hubby. No woman likes that and I became as distant as the burning Sun and though she was not successful in rejoining up, she found a new macho heart. Then it was a series of relations through friends and families. A US based scientist who believed that I broke her heart and who wanted a life not in India, a young "blue eyed" girl so much younger to me, one or two divorcees who shared a dream with me but nothing worked out. Guess I'm the culprit, a dark faced monster who liked the dark part of all taking on the stupid phone and resisted the sunshine.

Roads sometimes lead to blocked roads but like pathways which guide us to find roads, I walk groping in the dark fumbling in the moonlight in relish of a dawn cherished by a hope known only in love. My proposed missy is divorced once because her ex-hubby had doubts about her morality and character. He believed that her friends and even her brother were all imaginary lovers falco subbuteo with secretive liaisons. I'm lucky in this, I believe in friends; I believe not in a husband and wife passing their time only in looking into each other eyes and being happy. Oh, come on, everyone needs love of their friends and other distractions. Marriage and love are just conditions for a legal societal based living together, sex and making legitimate generations, right?

Many of you hardly know anything about me and I've purposely not done any "know-me" (sorry - Vijesh, IHM) tags because I was afraid of rejection and revealing so much about me; I was afraid of the villain image; I was afraid of projecting my melancholy (Indyeah - You guessed right) ; I was afraid of jutting out my own fears and reality.

I've grown up over the years and have matured aged and ripened my thought processes, my patience and my egoistic thoughts. I now don't believe in infatuations but love in patience and empathy; I now believe in human thoughts espoused with the belief in living and dying with hands enjoined. Please bless me as I donate her my used heart!

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

The Love Touch - Relations of the heart

One of my relative died this week. He was just 60 and was just beginning to enjoy love and what his little love life had to offer. Love of his children, who had matured to understand it. Love of his wife who has and had (but, and) no other option to love him with time. Love of his grand children. Love which he cherished and urged on, all his life. Love at his truest spirit.

What I believe is that love starts in the old age. In the old age, when the children grow up and are gone. In the old age, when the poor soul looks into each other and has only the complaints about other and an "only life" experience to share. A dependence only to Gods and the faith associated with it. A dependence in only each other, a clinging so intimate. Love starts then and there!

I thought I'll live for ever. I thought that I'm immune to diseases. I remember looking at people who exercised in the morning and evening for a better health and I’ve noticed people straining for a better life and I just smile. I smiled at their stupidity. I also laughed when they say they have high sugar in their blood stream and have cholesterol. I never thought that it is what it is to become a "human." and I'll finally experience it and live as one. I failed to fathom that we are all ordinary mortals under the mercy of nature. We can in a minute become sick or fall under the rubble with the shift of belts in an earthquake. The struggle of desperation and weakness in a human being is so noticeable in our daily existence that we are simply just such weaklings, but we imagine ourselves as super human beings capable of living for ever.

When I was small, I always was the Amithabh Bachchan, Dharmendra or the Vinod Khanna. When I used to be small and see the films, plume was high and after each film I used to enact the complete scenes in front to my Sister and my Parents and felt special among the giggles of the crowd. I always wanted to be the hero. The invincible that could bash up, sing and woo the girls I always wanted. Though the girls and villains are never the actual character and the mentality what I currently expect and my life has changed, I just wanted to be above all.

What are we? Are we are not just ourselves trying to prove ourselves in this world and trying to gain acceptance?

Is the girl who I'm trying to woo and marry not just an individual, an another soul who is trying to prove herself and trying for acceptance in this funny world? Is not life what I and what she has imagined the same? A life with someone who can respect each other and negotiate freedoms? A tension free life which is free of tautness and a beautiful froth of happiness along the way?

Money as we believe is the now the source of the all the happiness in this world. Money to buy a TV, so that we can pass the time, Money to buy exotic holidays, money to give cinematic gifts, money to buy time and money to buy even romantic dreams!

Where are we all heading? To the grave, right? Is time that we spend together so important when we amalgamate with soil? Is the soil concerned when blending two souls about its differences?

My dear Brother- Clinton (yes, his name is Clinton and he was named when the ex-president Bill Clinton assumed office), yesterday sent a beautiful SMS, which goes something like this, "It's just meaningless in expecting anyone to be your kind because you can't hold their right hand in your right hand to walk together." My respect really grew towards him even though it was just a SMS forward. Are we not just fools trying to be superior to others and trying to prove ourselves?Love and keep loving my dears. There is nothing else so important in this world. Hate and egoism is just temporary. Let us not lose our precious time in bickering and fights which proves nothing.

Love each other without expecting anything in return. Give the freedom to each other which even you don't cherish for yourselves. Love each other to prove nothing. That's life at its best! God Bless!!

Friday, April 10, 2009

The Nest

This is my first attempt to type in a poem in my blog. Though I "used" to write before, some of the feelings had "died" and I never could write again. Some of them have been "born" again that I dare to attempt again. Do give me a frank opinion if you comment!

Under the dawn eaves overlooking the moon;
The nest is still and sad,
As though it sorrows and grieves,
For many an empty lass and lad's soul.

From his quiet realm on hights,
The face in the Moon was jaded, it seemed,
Of dwelling so long in the land of dreams,
Enjoying the solitude of sleepless nights.

My Spirit gazed upon his face,
Ever so resilient, ever so proud;
And the twin sisters, hope and fear,
Told a tale of fairness and distant spheres.

Of faith shall love be born afresh;
Of faith that I shall be loved and a lover too;
Of faith after this poor soul has died;
Of faith in felicitous joy for a thousand nights.

From pain, from sorrows, from cold,
I hope of wrap within her warm arms;
Of no more a lonely night; awake,
With tingling whispers in her ears well into dawn.

What is fear, unknown, manipulated, but a curious mind?
Of battles lost or won;
Let it crawl or let it fly;
But just be here within my reach to stay!

Come along forever, come along now.
You for me, I for you. I promise you that;
Just pull me towards you, blame the wind push,
But just love me for sweet mercifulness sake.

Just keep holding me or pretend to,
As I fear my belittled nest is cold,
And now that I’ve lost my age of flying,
I fear there is nowhere left to fly to!

P.S - I'm yet to reply to the comments in my previous post and I'm yet to read and visit you guys to comment on your blog. Do forgive! My mind and time were not in tempo. Thanks!

Saturday, April 4, 2009

The Walk-In - Blinded By Hope

Thoughts paraded my mind as the time blew over carrying me around in my mentations. I looked idly at the cobwebs gathering fast in the upper corner of my room. I had been seeing that lock of spurious mesh for some months now. It was always lucky to escape the short broom. It had always been a challenge for me. A challenge because of my laziness. All that was required was a chair from the adjoining room and unfurling the scene of murder before my eyes. A spider seated amidst the entanglement of its hard work, rocked slowly matching the tempo of the circling fan. It seemed to eye me with tart vengeance as if I was the foreigner not it but we lived alone happily together in a room without invading each others space.

Loneliness has not been a stranger. What’s disturbing about loneliness is the redundant voice in you, pestering you that you must be mated to someone and that loneliness is a frightening mistake in the old age. As I believe that I age and that I age. The voice in you is not bothered about who you find. It just keeps tormenting you. I've often told people including my parents and friends around me of my intent to be left alone for a time. They agnized this and saw this announcement as trying to be devoid of their company. I often felt repentant, that I cherished such an unusual thing as solitude. To my friends and family, the declaration to be alone sounds as a sign of rejection and a sign of madness. I've noticed that many have never felt the need to be left alone; they rather enjoy a crowd, probably having always lived happily in relationships. They look upon me and my need for solitude as eccentricity and lunacy.

Finally one day, interior and exterior become one, and you are like a dumb person who has had a dream to finally commit. One day there comes an instant when a conclusion must be made. A lady climbes the ladder and comes into your life and you gloam into the tradition of must-fall-in-love. Love falls into a surrogate thought which befalls beliefs. Beliefs which cherishes norms. Norms which compliment hopes. Finally two people who want to love each other must question themselves how much they hope for as their love expands and intensifies, and how much risk they are inclined to take. It is in truth a fearsome gamble. To think of it, the way of the nature of love is to create. A matrimony itself is something which has to be created.

To get married is the biggest risk in earthly relations that a human can take. If we commit ourselves to one person for life, is there as ordinary mortals think a limitation of freedom? Will man be able to accommodate the change in his accustomed rhythm in life? Will he be selfish to the demands to give it all to love which is temporary? Is not love merely participation and not possession for life and in actuality invading each others space? Will he be able to express the gender equality what men internally cherish and comprehend in their daily interations? Will man never be called a "hen pecked" if he compromises and gives his soul to knead his actions?

I glanced again at the spider for some comment; it kept rocking to the breeze of the weary ceiling fan as if in agreement. And yet again, I invited the guest to walk the steps into my soul as the time passes by in my existence in this selfish world.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Women vs Men

This is something which I harvested from the web.

(A) How to Keep a Woman Happy"*
It's not at all difficult !

All you have to do is to be:

1. A friend
2. A companion
3. A lover
4. A brother
5. A father
6. A master
7. A chef
8. An electrician
9. A carpenter
10. A plumber
11. A mechanic
12. A decorator
13. A stylist
16. A psychologist
17. A pest exterminator
18. A psychiatrist
19. A healer
20. A good listener
21. An organizer
22. A good father
23. Very clean
24. Sympathetic
25. Athletic
26. Warm
27. Attentive
28. Gallant
29. Intelligent
30. Funny
31. Creative
32. Tender
33. Strong
34. Understanding
35. Tolerant
36. Prudent
37. Ambitious
38. Capable
39. Courageous
40. Determined
41. True
42. Dependable
43. Passionate


44. Give her compliments regularly
45. Love shopping
46. Be honest
47. Be very rich
48. Not stress her out
49. Not look at other girls


50. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
51. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself
52. Give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes


53. Never to forget: birthdays anniversaries arrangements she makes


1. Leave him in peace
2. Feed him well.
3. Let him have the remote control.

...... are you seriously looking for more??

This is a fun post. Women: Do take it sportingly and Men: Laugh away!!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Egoistic Padagogy - The Boss Factor

I wonder why people hold false personal or derived delusional beliefs and hold it with so much conviction in spite of reason or evidence to the contrary. This to me appears to be one stupid game. Why don't people realize that this is not a contest in who gets to have the last word and this wasted energy does not help anyone? I really don't want to try and fly across the Indian Ocean with a tiny little inflatable balloon holding myself up. The focus needs to be redirected towards the sufferer- Themselves.

I've waited patiently for people to change. Now I realize that that I'm going to just travel this road alone just like I've done this many years. I know that I'll succeed. It might be quite very isolated ahead than I expect but I guess this is all part of what it takes. I'll deny my isolation, I'll prove everyone wrong. Deny my desolation and prove them wrong. Deny my solitudinarian madness and prove them differently. I'll deny them a voice; I will speak louder and louder and keep shouting so as to keep them all mum.

That is why I've made a “future plan” for my futuristic living world. I must remind you that my living world, actually, is the world that my body exists in. My lawless, timeless, uncontrolled world being the world that dominates the sanenesss in me, and then my safety world where I'll develop and create situations and beliefs in my mind to cope or escape from dominating dictators. I refuse to be dictated that I'll only ever manage my “attitude”, rather than eradicate it completely. I want to keep up the hope and belief, that I've nothing but I've everything to survive without them in this world.

I purport to accomplish this task by realizing that time and egoistic bosses around me are just temporary, just a collection of temporary hook-ups. Just congresses till I get the ejaculation. Nothing else. They are never the actual thing and the one complete true story. No one are. Because they are just their story, each individuals everyday ego, insecurities in their position in the company, a differential custom-made history that they like to flaunt. By the same token, they believe that they are helping and reality doesn’t exist and never has. It is a concept they have created to make themselves superior. Which is another dullard concept and not a fact. The finite moment of life where ego compounds logic, and the whelming and the great euphoric sense of invincibility and immortality which cloud the outside world all but for the briefest of heartbeats and time.

The astute depth to which our own wide eyes can reach are only beaten by the depth of individuality and humbleness the heart can feel but they imagine a camera profoundly, majestically circling them from above enticing and magically encouraging them to continue. The devil bless their beliefs!

Friday, March 20, 2009

The Hollow Rustle of Money

This is to me, justifiably, a palpable anger at the turn of events following the "outright' bid and winning of Gandhiji's glasses, sandals, pocket watch, plate and a bowl, put up for auction by Sotheby's by US based collector named James Otis. Vijay Mallaya bought them for close to 10 crores. My anger is not against the political leaders for failing miserably in governance. My anger is not against the liquor baron's touching the items of a man who preached against alcohol. My ire is against the waste of money!

Before you start criticizing me for being anti-Gandhian and anti-patriotic, let's first look at the financial state of the people living in India. Read: the people!!

In my earliest recollection of the lessons in economics and civics in school, my economics teacher had made it simple the subjects of taxation by advocating that the bridge between the rich and the poor should be made less and hence taxes were introduced. India is home to approximately one-third of all poor people in the world. To be precise, India constitutes 33% of the global poor, which is nailed at 1.4 billion people.

Today, India Inc and the rich appear to have three fashioned approaches to tackling poverty. The first is fundamentally declare that there are no poor. Recent criticisms in the making of the movie, "Slum dog Millionaire" critiqued has people like Danny Boyle, the Oscar-winning director of Slumdog Millionaire wonder if he really did shoot the movie in the Mumbai teeming slums in Nehru Nagar and nearby Dharavi, which ironically is home to more than a million people and is the largest slum in Asia. Everyone was worried how India was portrayed. For them India is simply not the slums, the dirt and poverty. For the rich and the affluent, people living in the tiny shanties are simply not Indian. The second tactic of India Inc is to abolish the poor, rather than poverty. This is dramatically proven in Mumbai over the years when slum vicinities are razed, making thousands homeless. The Mumbai police simply followed suit by beating people up as protesters protested with a tear in their eye. Is it their India, they wondered. They are looked upon as cattle or any other lower form of life. People forget that the cramped huts near open sewers in narrow dirty lanes are what they call home. Mumbai Assistant Municipal Commissioner Umashankar Mistry very ironically said, "The plot has been earmarked as a playground and we will demolish all illegal settlements." A playground for whom? The children of a few rich Indians? I hear that the child actor of SDM still lives in an illegal structure made of tarpaulin sheets with his one-eyed mother and TB-suffering alcoholic father. Rubina Ali too lives in a one room tin roof shack perched above an ocean of trash which she shares with her parents and six siblings in this foul and run-down and repulsive Mumbai slum. The third approach is simply to ignore the poor. They simply fortify the belief that by the turn of the century poverty will simply disappear as the younger generation start working. So as economists sit and watch the inflation rate and compare it with the world markets, a yet another generation is living in dire straits with maybe a single lucky meal to compliment as it closes his eyes to the open sky with rumbling empty stomachs.

Is India Inc and "India Shinning" able to provide one of the most basic and most important necessities like clean air, drinking water, nutritious food, and safe shelters to all its Citizens? Or do they care only for the likes of me who pay taxes?

Article 47 says: "The state shall regard the raising of the level of nutrition and standard of living of its people as among its primary duties and in particular, the state shall endeavor to bring about prohibition of the use except for medicinal purposes of intoxicating drinks and of drugs which are injurious to health."

Democracy, as now practiced in India, is more about survival of politicians, their pride and their political parties. It's no more about its people. In fact, India's Independence which was an epic struggle for democracy, freedom and liberty, was meant only for her own people. People!!

India has forgotten all its commitments to its citizens be it the Rs.3.86 billion Chandrayaan mission to the moon, which proved nothing when it had been done 68 times before by everyone in this world and the 10,000 crore proposed manned mission to the moon. The defense budget of India is proposed at 40 billion dollars (Around 200, 000 crores) in 2009 when all we fought was some infiltrators in the last 20-30 years. For a few, the high-profile, harmless petty war like Kargil came in handy and the war was termed as the ultimate practice session and actual war like test session for the thousands of war deprived soldiers.

A total of about five million people are addicted to alcohol in India. Read: Addicted, i.e. they have a compulsive need to drink everyday. An absence in alcohol or a slight decrease of alcohol in their blood causes nausea, sweating, shakiness, and anxiety. To overcome this, the addict dedicatedly "donates" his hard earned money and arrives home to see empty stomachs and ailed families. We as people have no time to imagine their pathetic lives. Except from a few NGO's who try to better the lives of their sorry lives, they turn poorer everyday and lose their health. The production, distribution and sale of alcohol is not only a lucrative venture but an artful and manipulative scheme to appease people who are stressed and live in the margins of society. By all chronicles, the alcohol related risks have invited scant attention from the Indian government. Alcohol unfortunately comes under the horizon of state governments, and each state's stupid politician has a lucrative incentive to expand outlets accredited to sell alcohol since its taxes contribute an estimated 20 percent of each state's revenue and every domestic liquor baron contributes lavishly to political campaigns under the expense of the poor addict. If the Indian government controls opium, prescription drugs, and harmful food additives, why not alcoholic beverages?

James Otis, before he set forth to give Gandhi's items for auction tried his best to negotiate with India on, "two proposals he had submitted – increase in the spending on the poor and fully paid exhibition of Gandhi's items in 78 countries to spread the apostle of peace's message of non violence." He wanted the Govt to keep aside 5% of the total India GDP for the poor. The Indian government had rejected the proposals sent by Otis arguing that conditions set by him infringed on the country's sovereignty. Vijay Mallaya bid for the items even though his combined debt of his six listed companies has touched a whopping Rs 14,231 crore, as on December 2008. The identity of the bidders in the auction is a guarded secret and the stupidity with which the base price of 20,000 was increased to 1.8 Million by possibly Indians themselves is both heartening and disheartening. Vijay mallaya is not new to all this kind of publicity stunts. Mallaya had spent Rs 180 million to cover the entire Sabrimala sanctum sanctorum with gold, ostensibly to gain some publicity from the investment with his name inscribed in gold everywhere. He had also previously bid for the sword of Tipu Sultan and had said proudly that, "I always believed that items of great heritage value should be owned by India and restored to India." But ironically little do people know that the sword is still not in India but is maintained by him in San Francisco, California, USA.

As yet another political election drama enfolds before my eyes and crores are spent, accounted and unaccounted, it just makes me wonder, why should I be proud being called an Indian?

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

A Break

This is Biju Mathew's friend. He is not well and asked me to post this note on his behalf. He conveyed that he would not be able to read and comment on everyone's post for a few more days. He is sorry about it.


Friday, March 6, 2009

The Leap of Faith

After my work yesterday, early morning at 3:30am, I went with my colleague to his house to watch some television. Oh, yes, my T.V is still waiting for spare parts and a miracle even after 2 months. I tried a couple of times to wedge out the remote from his hands but he was mesmerized by a "healing session" in one of the local channels. A charismatic and handsome middle aged man in a dark black suit was rendering people unconscious by touch and supposedly healing them in the name of God. Oh, sorry, it was not touch but rather a melancholic outcry of non vowels which went something like, "ra ra raa Raaa Raaah Raaahhh raaa raa ra ra." No sooner were the words uttered, the subjects to our amazement fell down on their backs as if lightning had struck them. Once done, they rose up, smiled for the camera and testified what disease the "Holy Spirit" took out of them amid cries of "Halleluiah! Halleluiah!" However, I amusingly noticed that many who fell with a jolt from the air were clearly self-conscious enough to pull their shirts back down over their stomachs or use their hands to break the fall. If they were "filled with the spirit" and unconsciously fell down, would they be really worried about exposing a belly?

I'm not an atheist but I'm completely wary of those who cast out "the demons" of asthma, blindness, AIDS, cancer, diabetes or anything which affects the human anatomy and those who come to pray and collect money. I'm always filled with rage at fakirs, faith healers, holy men who consider feeding, tantalizing, baiting fake hopes to innocent mortals desperately in quest of a miracle just to propagate their own convictions. I loathe the total system of self-deception and suspension of disbelief. Are they able to bring back the dead or re-grow an amputated limb in the name of God? You will have to remember that this is the same ‘God’ who flooded and swamped the whole earth, divided the Red Sea, and as per Bible carved humans from mud. Are they able to make a bald man grow hair right there on the stage? Or maybe remove scars from a burned victim's face? No, all healings ever recorded are paid, unseeable, and unverifiable. Does this make sense if you look at it from the theological side? All there ever was are "healings" that are temporary and brought on by euphoria, emotions and wishful thinking. I feel disturbed and saddened by the colossal gullibility and stupidity of so many thousands of people. These faith healers are just accomplished and wealthy conmen who prey on the vulnerability, helplessness, hopes, and superstitions of millions of worshippers who all want a quick fix.

Googling up I found a list of these "faith healers" mostly from the Christian faith:

Oral Roberts, Richard Roberts, Rod Parsley, Morris Cerullo, Paul Crouch, C. Peter Wagner, Paul Cain, Juanita Bynam, Benny Hinn, T.B. Joshua, John Arnott, John Kilpatrick, Steve Hill, Kenneth Hagin, Kenneth Copeland, Joyce Meyers, Earl Paulk, Fred Price, Creflo Dollar, R.W. Shambach, Reinhard Bonnke, Christian Harfouche, Rick Joyner, Mike Bickle, Tommy Tenney, Cindy Jacobs, George Otis. Jr., Michael Brown, Jack Deere, Randy Clark, Colin Dye, Nicky Gumbal, Ed Silvoso, Markus Bishop, Kim Clement, Jesse Duplantis, Marilyn Hickey, Rodney Howard-Browne, T.D. Jakes, Robert Tilton and probably a whole bevy of others like them!!

The only guy that I've had ever heard of is an entertainer called Benny Hinn. Benny is different than them all. He makes a staggering amount of money in his world wide religious crusades. He goes on to the stage, dramatically swings his arms and paralyzed victims in wheel chairs automatically stand up and walk. All he does is, wave his arms and a complete standing crowd as a group will instantly fall on their backs! I've seen him on TV with his gold watches, fancy suits, and expensive luxury cars. Benny simply doesn't hide his hunger for money, and he makes it obvious with his outlandish living styles and purchases. He buys people with money to fall for him, to stand up and push their own wheel chairs. Everything large scale! The saddest fact is that Benny could not cure his Mother who was diabetic and his Father who died of cancer.

All know that magic is about illusion and tricks. Simply put magic tricks are very clever illusions. Magicians flourish on the principle that people are gullible and the human mind is very easy to trick when tricks are done with speed. But it's an irony that all magicians do not claim supernatural power. This is the only difference between professional magicians and the numerous fake healers in this world. The fake healers arrogate that they perform miracles. But the truth is that these men are like parasites feeding on the weak and the sick. Vulnerable is the person whose spirit and body has been devastated by an illness. They go to such healing sessions and healers because all other means of a cure have failed. They look at a miracle as their last chance to get their health back. Fake healers understand this human weakness and they use it to get what they want - money.

As skeptics, earthlings need to opine out and make our voices heard, maybe at least for the sake of the despairing people so handily victimized by the faith healers.
Secular humanism calls for it. Amen!

Monday, March 2, 2009

The Love Bleed

It's not a great feeling when someone we care about rejects our attempts to become closer to them. Men and women act differently to this. In reality, 99% of all people want a real relationship and would love to have a special someone… somebody with whom they could at last let their guard down, and go through true love.

So, what's going wrong? Is it the physical appearance or is it the emotional bond which displays hindrance? Of course I don't want to discuss the attractive and beautiful mortals who are smart, sexy, handsome, and maybe successful because these are always flirted with and approached all the time. I want to discuss the average looking but the romantic some things that fall in-and-out of love everyday.

In realism, I and virtually all other men in this planet, have never ejected away from a woman because we weren't “ready for a kinship” or because we “needed to take things slow” whilst that’s what we must and may have communicated at the time. The long and short of the reason we pulled out is that if the woman is not the same woman we fell in love with then how can we continue being in love? The problem with women is that with time they start the "ownership" game. Instead of maintaining individualities they over-do, over-worry, over-analyze and start working too hard to keep the relationship going. In short they over-function, crib about everything, over-imagine and worst of all express it out thinking that they are working on the "relationship." Well, does that work? The hell it works! Men may act emotionally bull-like, indifferent, and impregnable, but most men are astonishingly fragile emotionally. The truth is that it's just the baseline part of their more “masculine” physical composition not to portray or communicate about these things all the time so as to avoid the created chance for connection and intimacy.

Men and women cogitate problems and situations in different mannerisms. So what makes signified from a woman's angle is so different what actually works with a man. So if one acts so predictable and lacks all emotional intelligence, its enough to prove that one is going to be less and less fun and easygoing as time goes on. It's not at all fair but if a sensible woman doesn't know how to create attraction for her man and is insensitive to a man's emotional opening-up and closing, how will the man feel it for her, even if the connection used to be there. Things go automatically in his mind, "what the hell! When did this bend from all that fun, excitement of love into a lot of commitment and work? And to top it all, women tend to chain love by keep wanting a "serious talk" every time, defining and redefining the relationship. They keep trying to chain the relationship alive but in actuality end up pushing the guy away. This is the cliche!

Both men and women would like to meet on top of the scenic mountain hand in hand but only if men realize that women may not have the physical strength to climb it and only if women realize that it may be too boring for the man on top of the mountain. Only if…

Thursday, February 26, 2009

The Choosy Love Vile

I always feel that human beings are great suckers for a beautiful face and probably a very sexy shape. These obsessional, crying and demanded generalizations about “attractiveness” finds me wondering how on earth the fat, short, scrawny and the absolutely flat chested human beings manage to find love. Maybe I'm generalizing things too far out. Maybe the more rebellious of mankind would like to contradict but I'm really thwarted to notice that there is usually no cryptic criticism of the supposals that these assumptions are based upon. Why do we even care?

The ultimate point of love is to get married and finally the factual point of getting married is to have children. I know that there are of course biological mating motives and urges of which we are not conscious, which is why most people want to have kids of their own in spite of the realism that there maybe very little pure rationalism to do so and why women in general bond very fast with their new borne and feel protective of them, and yet again why young persons masturbate and have sexual urges long ahead anyone ever explains sex to them.

I wonder what are single men/women, then? Tragic losers just looking forward to the probable occurrence of the biological imperative to kick in? Of course, I don’t imply that women in general are programmed to be sluts, nor do I imply that men are incompetent of being misogynists. But I believe that people get trapped in an oscillation of hungering approval, wanting love and dreaded rejection. It's an awful spinning wheel of confusion and pain. Seeking commendation from everyone around us is similar to the nauseous giddiness a ballet dancer feels when she doesn't keep her eyes on one object as she twirls and turns.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Fractured Fairy Love Tales

Sometimes I realize that my life is like a fairy tale which did not complete. A fairy tale that just died before it started. A complete lie which was told to me as a tale. There is never a happy ending. We are all condemned earthlings sent by the creator, who knows our inevitable fate but we hold firm beliefs of oblivion, of heaven, of hell. In theory we are simple morons who consume, who drink ourselves into a happy stupor, perform our daily obligations, and use one another for social amusement.

Several factors play importance in our using up one another to live. The first thing that is requisite is a personality that does not switch based on a particular situation. Does one stand firm to one's values and persona despite the chance for shortcuts and noetic laziness? Does one have the instinct for honesty and humane justice? Does this instinct set its horizon upon only one outcome or does it consider all factors like selfishness, hatred and love in the abstract? Is the feeble mind a fair mediator of conflict which can rightly see all sides? I basically believe that soon age will slow us all down and so all battles need not be fought and won. It is better to live at peace with onself than be corpses addicted to petty amusement.

We were brought up with tales of many a handsome prince and many a beautiful princesses. We were only told gallant tales of winning love, of slaying dragons and conquering love. Why were we never told stories of how to live happily with our princesses? How do we know what is the right way to love, to live a married life and how to keep our love? Why were we not told tales of how to love? Are we to watch the movies and assume the way to love and assume the way to live with a woman? Are we to behave the same as we behaved with our Sisters and our Mothers, fighting and throwing tantrums? Will that work with our wife or loved one? Will she call that physical and mental harassment? In living together with a loved one, it is important to consider, not just feelings, satisfactions and good things in the relationship, since living together on an everyday basis inclines to highlight (in ways just dating and casual love does not) bad habits, bad manners, bad moods, and finally the most important factor - boredom. Few, if you may imagine, can be thrilling and exciting, new and wonderful but not all of them. I don't understand why people who are in deep love "just want to live together." Is not the living daily together the toughest part of a relationship or marriage? Does not living apart, even though seeing each other everyday or most of the time, allow some privacy, some ignition and some recuperation from all the time together?

I think it's pretty easy to become attracted romantically to other people but we should not expect that relationship to flower with the sweet smell of success just because of those feelings. I believe that one can relish the feelings of love without even telling the person we love. It's better that way. Isn't it better not to own and be responsible for someone? Was it not feasible if one could tell the other they are attracted to, either intellectually, sexually, romantically, however, about their love and stay smitten by them or to them without thereby seeking or needing to become lovers or have a fuller relationship? The trouble only begins if one freezes one's life expectations or let it ruin because one wants to act unsuitable so as to tamper those feelings or would like them returned. The irony is that the other person might be very pleased and satisfied just to know that you care about them, as long as neither of you behave unreasonably or have unreasonable expectations or demands just because of the attraction.

As we grow older, we may remember more of those fairy tales. Loved ones would leave us, friends and acquaintances would surprise us by appearing again, and those respected tales meant for fairies we imagined as young children of this earthly world may disappear one by one.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009


Well this is my first tag after I crashed into the blog world and made quite a good number of friends. I find myself among intellectuals who I admit have altered how I view life. I was tagged by Nimmy and she told me to add up 10 songs - few from my mother tounge and maybe one another language, preferably Hindi. I did comment her that I may add up all the four languages that I listen to. So here they are. Enjoy!!


* Ponnum Thinkal Pottum
* Akale - Title Song
* Oru Raathri Koodi - Summer In Bethlahem
* Thenum Vayambum
* Thamarakkili Paadunnu - Moonampakkam
* Poomkaate Poyi Chollamo - Shyama
* Chandana Katte - Bheeshmacharya
* Pularkala Sundhara Swapnathil Njan Oru
* Poomaaname - Nirakoottu
* Chembarathi Poove Chollu
* Aayiram Kannumaayi - Nokketha Dhoorathu Kan


* Uyirai Tholaithen
* Kadhal Konden
* Partha Mudhal Naal
* Munbe Vaa - Sillunu Oru Kadhal
* Ennai Konjam - Kakka Kakka
* Ennai Kaanavilaiyeh - Kadhal Desam
* Kaadhal Rojave - Roja
* Mudhinam Paarthene - Vaaranam Aayiram
* Kangal Irandal - Subramaniapuram


* Dil De Diya Hai - Masti
* Awarapan Banjarapan
* Sheesha Ho Ya Dil Ho
* Akhion Kay Jorokhoon Say
* Tu is Tarah Se Meri Zindagi Mein
* Pal Pal Dil Ke Paas - Blackmail
* Likhe Jo Khat Tujhe - Kanyadaan
* Aur is Dil Mein Kya Rakha Hai - Immandaar
* Tumse Milke
* Dil Mera Churaya Kyun - Akele Hum Akele Tum
* Maine Dil se Kaha Dhund Lana Na Kushi


* Have I told you lately that I love you - Rod Stewart
* Because I love you - Shakin Stevens
* Unchained Melody - Righteous Brothers
* Making love out of nothing at all - Air Supply
* The Power of Love - Jennifer Rush
* Karma Chameleon - Boy George - Culture Club
* Broken Wings - Mr. Mister
* Hazard - Richard Marx
* I believe I can Fly - R. kelly
* Tonight I celeberate my love - Peabo Bryson and Roberta Flack
* Sealed with a kiss - Jason Donavan
* Waiting for a girl like you
* Those were the days - Mary Hopkin
* 500 Miles - The Brother Four

Thursday, February 12, 2009

The Rape of the Women's Morality by Charles Darwin

Something shocking transpired in Kerala which didn't touch the media antennas nor did it touch the sentiments of the society too much. A two-and half-year old baby girl was quietly taken away from her destitute mother sleeping near a bus shelter in Kozhikode, a growing metropolis in north Kerala. She was found the next day raped with blood secretion from the vagina and injury on her lips. A two-and-half year old baby! Just a two-and-half year girl!! I know that nothing will happen here because the media and the feminists are very busy preparing for the big day. The day in history where they will take the next great leap in women empowerment. They are busy collecting "Pink Chaddis," rehearsing their say on the atrocities by a few goons who disrupted their pub going culture and planning their schedules for a romantic Valentine's Day. I guess the poor destitute souls simply don't have a voter ID and are not simply part of a vehement society that Charles Darwin has created for us. The minds of the people have been drilled in believing that fear of rape is not all about “rape” in the ordinary Physical and sexual sense but it includes all other circumstances where men feel like dominating and reigning women, and using his gender as an advantage to overpower her.

Women look suspiciously at every male trying to be friendly with them on the street. They don't even venture out in the streets alone in the fear that men will rape them. In 98.28 per cent of 581 rape cases registered last year, the "rape" accused were known to the victims and had been interacting with the victims in the normal course of life. It has to be understood by women that "men" don't rape women the minute they see them. The more women try to be afraid of men the more they are being targeted as weaklings. What makes them weaklings when they too have sharp teeth, hard knuckles, lethal elbows and powerful knee joints? What makes it difficult for them to use any one of them when they are being raped? Why do they need to cry out for help and waste the energy and stamina to ward off men in a typical rape scenario? The pervert in me stood to wonder why the "'Man" with an overly excited bulge in his loins did not attack and rub in his masculinity in the nearby sleeping dog? Did it fear the sharp claws of his agile legs?" Did he fear the tart teeth on his precious maleness? Women, I believe should rise up their horizons and bolt out their inhibitions which the society has created for them. The "Amnesia" bar scenario is no exception; it begs me to question why the women didn't call the police and go back to the pub to have their drink? A thought to be considered! Were they afraid that they were not part of the secular and constitutional India? Were they afraid of "Men?" Were they afraid of the media who would label them "Anti Hindu?" or "Anti Indian?"

As we celebrate the Charles Darwin anniversary, a total hypocrite to the extent that he was instrumental in creating the concept called feminism. He invited the wrath, belief and the convictions among a gender which I believe is no inferior and helpless than the so called "Man" he wanted to be called. He hard scripted beliefs in an innocent society and declared that, (Quote) "‘women… constant companion, (friend in old age) who will feel interested in one, object to be beloved and played with—better than a dog anyhow—Home, and someone to take care of house—Charms of music and female chit-chat. These things good for one’s health"

Before his marriage to his own cousin and fathering 10 children he wrote that, "how should I manage all my business if I were obligated to go every day walking with my wife—Eheu!’ As a married man I would be a ‘poor slave … worse than a Negro’ and then reminisced that ‘One cannot live this solitary life, with groggy old age, friendless and cold and childless staring one in one’s face …’

The weaker gender as imposed by Charles Darwin got imposed in the society to the extent that Women have always been presented in literature and even in mythology that characterizes the thinking of groups, societies and nation as submissive and passive, a weakling to the core. Even though the last past years have seen striking increases in the quad usable for women in the Indian society and women in general with the help of affirmative policies and programmers by the government and revolting initiatives by feminists and NGOs the impact has been considerate but not enough to change the views of "men" in general that women is a human after all.

For an ultimate revelation, biologically the women are a stronger sex. In societies around the world the women when treated equally to men have outlived men, and hence there are more women than men in the world. But reverse is the case in India with the census proving that there are fewer women for men in India with the sole exception of Kerala. Every other State had fewer women than men accounting to foetal homicide and dowry issues

Women need to stand up dusting off the age old beliefs of the society and "Darwinism" and emerge strong and confident individuals, in total control of their own lives and able to raise their voices to demand their rightful existence and presence in this world. They are instead asking themselves if the glass is half full or half empty.

Though I'm concerned about all the women in the world in general, I believe that women in India are a deprived lot in terms of personal space and freedom. The India's total female population of India is more than the cumulative populations of Canada, USA and the Russia but still women are afraid to walk the high bridge and show the world that they are no lesser animals. Why were they opposed by the society in encouraging remarriage, supporting female education, and opposing polygamy in the older days? Why are they still to a few exceptions due to globalization coerced to wearing purdahs and hijabs? Why are they still forced to sell their morality and bodies for money to satisfy the male pleasures?

The untoward female to male ratio can be explicated by the fact that women in India are still second class citizens. It is cogent evidence that, at every stage in their lives starting from their gory births the women in general are deprived of their rights and entitlements, and singled out in a variety of ways. Who could forget the legendary Travancore (kingdom of Kerala) decision to impose tax on women for the right to cover their upper body? Who could forget that the Women had no legal or social status rights other than that educed from their stand in the family and could not inherit, except for the poor widow who was esteemed to 'use' her husband's property if there were no male heir, and had few options to support themselves? Who can forget sati? Who could forget that in the past golden era, women were just literary subjects in whom the Vishnu cult fathered narrations, the Ramayana and stories of Krishna devotional songs, with courtly love as a trope, which sported women as heroines and just simple objects and entertainments of desire?

I hated Charles Darwin when I read in his famous research and writings that, "A wife did not aspire to be her husband’s intellectual companion, but rather to amuse his leisure hours." The
The Charles Darwin's "Darwinian" principles of male superiority assisted to increase the secularization and divisions in society

From time immemorial the doctrines and convictions dictated and transferred to boys and girls in the family have created gender differences. Of course I believe that that these are not all mutually undivided singled theories and are innate but are reinforced and exaggerated by the likes of Charles Darwin whose birthday we are very joyously celebrating!!

Saturday, February 7, 2009

The Valentine Blues

I got a conscience wake up call today when I heard the "new terrorists of India" a newly sprouted political gang named Shiv Ram Sena who I hate to publicize but have to cite and question their point of view. They reportedly held a press conference to announce that they would be patrolling the streets, armed with "mangalsutra" (bridal necklace). They announced, “If we come across couples being together in public and expressing their love we will take them to the nearest temple and conduct their marriage."

I wonder if they have no other job. Are they all living in a stinky deep shit well to realize that not everyone gets married with a “mangalsutra?” How are they going to assume who is a Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist or a Jain? And since when did they assume the role of our Parents? I would like to remind them some other duties a regular parent does so that they can exorcise them…

1: Restrict easy availability of cheap pornographic material in the forms of books, porn sites in the internet and MMS's
2: Go for legal fights with media and Bollywood for stupid indicatory pelvic dances and suggestive advertisements
3: Fight the drug lobby for easily available drugs

I'm limiting this to only three so that they can easily achieve their goals before the elections and become the new guardians of India.

Have they thought deeply enough about their norms and actions being sensible? Do they know that Valentine's Day is not just celebrated between lovers? Do they know that there are at least 9-10 different flowers given off in a typical Valentine's Day? Let us educate them least they marry off even friends, brothers and relatives

Red Roses: Symbolically red roses convey romantic love and enduring passion. This is the perfect flower to say, "I Love You," (Just read: I love you and we will marry if we like each others attitudes and if our "Parents" agree).

White Roses: Symbolic of purity, truth, innocence and respect

Yellow Roses: Symbolizes friendship and celebration. Used to convey "Let's Be Friends," (Read: Let's be friends and not, "let's wait for Ram Sena to get us married")

Pink Roses: Symbolize admiration, gentleness and sweetness and are associated with friendship (Hope you are not color blind and can sense the difference between "Red" and "Pink"

(Note for the Ram Sena: Any other color, just ignore the couple, you may not understand the depth of human relations)

Let's agree with one point for them, celebrating Valentine's Day is a Western tradition, absolutely no doubt, but in this era of globalization (hope they have gone to school and have heard of it), it has come to be a celebration for men and women around the world. Do they know that the modern Indian morality is a direct result of a variety of historical events?

Let's educate them before the elections: (Source: Wikipedia)

Harappan culture: Paleolithic Age, roughly between 400,000 and 200,000 B.C

Vedic Aryans: A series of migrations by Indo-European-speaking seminomads took place during the second millennium B.C

Kingdoms and Empires: The Aryan and Greek penetration between 1500 and ca. 800 B.C. A two-way cultural fusion between Indo-Greek communities, especially in art and architecture

The Mauryan Empire: Emergence of Magadha in the eastern Indo-Gangetic Plain. In 322 B.C., Magadha, under the rule of Chandragupta Maurya. Ashoka, grandson of Chandragupta, ruled from 269 to 232 B.C. Disintegration of the Mauryan Empire India's unguarded borders again attract a series of invaders between 200 B.C. and A.D. 300. As the Aryans had done, the invaders became "Indianized" in the process of their conquest and settlement.

The Deccan and the South: Cheras, Cholas and the Pandyas frequently fought to gain regional and cultural supremacy.

Gupta and Harsha: The military exploits of the first three rulers, Chandragupta I (ca. 319-335), Samudragupta (ca. 335-376), and Chandragupta II (ca. 376-415) in North India

The Southern Rivals: Peninsular India involved in an eighth-century tripartite power struggle among the Chalukyas (556-757) of Vatapi, the Pallavas (300-888) of Kanchipuram, and the Pandyas (seventh through the tenth centuries) of Madurai. The Chalukya rulers were overthrown by their subordinates, the Rashtrakutas, who ruled from 753 to 973.

The Plunders: Mahmud of Ghazni (971-1030), who was also known as the "Sword of Islam," mounted seventeen plundering expeditions between 997 and 1027. The sultanate was in constant state of uncertainty as more than five dynasties rose and fell.

The Mughals (1398- 1707): In the early sixteenth century, descendants of the Mongol, Turkish, Iranian, and Afghan invaders of South Asia - Mughals invaded and spread their traditions

The Marathas: They were left virtually alone before the invading Afghan forces, headed by Ahmad Shah Abdali (later called Ahmad Shah Durrani), who routed them on the blood-drenched battlefield at Panipat in 1761

The Coming of the Europeans: Portuguese, Dutch, British, and French

The British Empire :( 1757-1947) - Diffused with ample ethnocentric sense of superiority, British intellectuals crashed through a movement that brought Western intellectual and technological innovations to Indians. There mission was to "civilize" India and rule it until Indians proved themselves competent for self-rule. Western-educated Hindu's assayed to rid Hinduism of its much criticized social dilemmas like idolatry, the caste systems, child marriages, and sati.

Now its question time for the Ram Sena before the bell rings and we disperse the class -

Whose tradition are you following? The Harappans, the Vedic Aryans, the Greeks, the Mauryans, the Mughals, the Invaders from the Mongol, Iran and Afghan or the Marathas?

Does not every society celebrate love and desire? What would be there without love and desire? Is the Ram Sena uncomfortable with the great Indian and Hindu poet - Kalidasa who historied about the human torso, desire, passion, sex, courtly love and companionship? Are they ashamed of Lord Krishna, who typified youthful love, desire and attraction? Do they deny that "The Kama Sutra" which is a Hindu treatise on love and sex was not, "Made in India?" Do they believe that the elaborate sexual activity portrayed in stone in Khajuraho was dropped by the UFO's? Was the Hindu festival of Holi which is also an Indian version of celebrating love introduced by the Aryans, Dravidians, Mauryans or the Marathas?

Do not India's ethnic culture, the varying linguistics, and regional complexness set it apart from other countries as an ultimate world civilization, secular and varied in all aspects?

Have not great philosophers such as Immanuel Kant pointed out that, "Love in the ordinary sense of the word cannot be commanded, because issues relating to feelings or emotions are not relevant to moral commands?" Were you not young once with feelings of love, the need to copulate and be wanted in love?

Trust me, Ram Sena, when I say that there was a golden time when one celebrated love in India openly and without inhibitions and the rulers protected it. If you don't want to support just protect it by being a silent bodyguard for the couple while they dream away with their hands enticed and remind them in the evening that it's dark, safely escort and drop them back in their homes and wish them good night and good luck. If "Goondas" like you simply don't have this helping mentality and culture then go to sleep like the Rip Van Winkle and wake up 20 years later to see the 20 year old young generation of the very couples you are very vehemently trying to pull apart in the name of God!

As for me, I'm very much energized by your attitude. I'm going to order for around 100 "red flowers," open up a small temporary shack behind St Theresa's College in Kochi, Kerala, where I'll distribute it between 10 A.M to 12:00 noon, freely to any couple who wants to propose in front of me and be reminded that I'll be there with at least 100 of my friends waiting for you to disrupt them. God created butts soft not just to be comfortable on political chairs but also to be kicked in the ass publicly by people like me. Best of luck and see you there!!

Monday, February 2, 2009

Run Mama Run - Delusional Suspicions

This is a story of two couples who messed up their lives. This is the story of two very educated couples who dreamt a home and a family. This is the story of millions of men and women who loose the faith, the trust and the hope of living together everyday. This is the story of agony, loneliness and fear. This is the story of revenge and delusional suspicion.

Vijayasree Voora married Dr. V Ravi Chandran a scientist in the USA. Vijayasree purportedly did her education from the University of Hawaii at Manoa (1993 to 1995) and the Purdue University (1995 - 1999). Being well educated she worked as a lecturer. The couple borne a child named Aditya. Everything seemed fine until one day the ugly face of egoism showed its face. They decided to divorce but now what about Aditya. The custodial battle in USA was swift and according to very stringent laws in the USA, Chandra was almost made to rake out $ 3,00,000 (Rs 1.5 crore) as an one-time settlement and he was ordered to pay $ 2,500 (Rs 1.2 lakh) per month as maintenance for the child every month. Aditya was allowed custodial of 20 days with his mother and the remaining 10 days with Chandran. Soon Chandran wanted Aditya only for himself and wanted to deny him to his biological Mother. He filed for legal custody by claiming that Vijayasree is mentally disturbed. She in turn accused him of being a pedophile and sexually molesting Aditya. The court but directs Aditya to his Father. Vijayasree requests a month of stay with her child before he goes for ever to live with his father and also requests for a journey with him to India so that Aditya could visit his grand parents and relatives for the last time. She journeys but never returns back to the USA. Dr. Ravi files a complaint for kidnapping and the court issues an arrest warrant in January 2007. Two years have gone by and the Mother is still running and evading an international manhunt.

What makes human beings delusional and suspicious? Why do people disturb their family life by creating illusory ideas? Why do egoist couples make repeated accusations based on insignificant or minimal evidence, often citing apparently normal or everyday events or duties to back up their claim? They also take great pains to test their partner's claim and go to such large lengths to monitor the partner’s behavior and everyday movements, sometimes to great extremes, such as waiting outside the partner's office, checking their incoming phone calls or checking their emails

In most cases of the current child custody drama, the court favors the mother. After all, children do need their mothers particularly at an early age. And this is not to discredit Mothers but I strongly believe Fathers too are significant in a young child's life. When the child custody becomes a conflict and battle, everyone loses on the way to some ego victory - Innocent children, the couple’s future and the whole family's peace. Children need the love of both parents and should never be asked to choose between the two most important people in their lives

On the 2nd anniversary of the escapade, I mull over about their torn lives and remember the story of the wise Solomon who was adjudicating the trail of two mothers who were claiming the ownership of a baby. Both the mothers argued that the baby was their baby. The wise King ordered the baby to be cut in half and each mother receives half the baby. One mother screamed and pleaded the king not to hurt the baby and to give the baby to the other woman. The king thus knew that the woman who cared for her baby was the real parent.

But seeing the manhunt initiated by Dr. Chandra who has even created a website and the way the biological Mother is termed an "International Kidnapper," posted and portrayed as a "severely mentally disturbed" person and some "petty and daily" Mother struggles in bringing up a child posted as video leaves no confusion in my mind that Dr Ravi is the disturbed person. His stupid logic quoted from the website says, "Aditya lived like a prince in father's home while Vijayasree Voora made him a street urchin and gave him a lifestyle of a filthy beggar." is too much to fathom. I just wish that Vijayasree keeps running until her husband understands his folly, gives the respect he needs to give his wife and welcomes them both back with love and an understanding which God imparted to only us mortals.