The Choosy Love Vile

I always feel that human beings are great suckers for a beautiful face and probably a very sexy shape. These obsessional, crying and demanded generalizations about “attractiveness” finds me wondering how on earth the fat, short, scrawny and the absolutely flat chested human beings manage to find love. Maybe I'm generalizing things too far out. Maybe the more rebellious of mankind would like to contradict but I'm really thwarted to notice that there is usually no cryptic criticism of the supposals that these assumptions are based upon. Why do we even care?

The ultimate point of love is to get married and finally the factual point of getting married is to have children. I know that there are of course biological mating motives and urges of which we are not conscious, which is why most people want to have kids of their own in spite of the realism that there maybe very little pure rationalism to do so and why women in general bond very fast with their new borne and feel protective of them, and yet again why young persons masturbate and have sexual urges long ahead anyone ever explains sex to them.

I wonder what are single men/women, then? Tragic losers just looking forward to the probable occurrence of the biological imperative to kick in? Of course, I don’t imply that women in general are programmed to be sluts, nor do I imply that men are incompetent of being misogynists. But I believe that people get trapped in an oscillation of hungering approval, wanting love and dreaded rejection. It's an awful spinning wheel of confusion and pain. Seeking commendation from everyone around us is similar to the nauseous giddiness a ballet dancer feels when she doesn't keep her eyes on one object as she twirls and turns.

Fractured Fairy Love Tales

Sometimes I realize that my life is like a fairy tale which did not complete. A fairy tale that just died before it started. A complete lie which was told to me as a tale. There is never a happy ending. We are all condemned earthlings sent by the creator, who knows our inevitable fate but we hold firm beliefs of oblivion, of heaven, of hell. In theory we are simple morons who consume, who drink ourselves into a happy stupor, perform our daily obligations, and use one another for social amusement.

Several factors play importance in our using up one another to live. The first thing that is requisite is a personality that does not switch based on a particular situation. Does one stand firm to one's values and persona despite the chance for shortcuts and noetic laziness? Does one have the instinct for honesty and humane justice? Does this instinct set its horizon upon only one outcome or does it consider all factors like selfishness, hatred and love in the abstract? Is the feeble mind a fair mediator of conflict which can rightly see all sides? I basically believe that soon age will slow us all down and so all battles need not be fought and won. It is better to live at peace with onself than be corpses addicted to petty amusement.

We were brought up with tales of many a handsome prince and many a beautiful princesses. We were only told gallant tales of winning love, of slaying dragons and conquering love. Why were we never told stories of how to live happily with our princesses? How do we know what is the right way to love, to live a married life and how to keep our love? Why were we not told tales of how to love? Are we to watch the movies and assume the way to love and assume the way to live with a woman? Are we to behave the same as we behaved with our Sisters and our Mothers, fighting and throwing tantrums? Will that work with our wife or loved one? Will she call that physical and mental harassment? In living together with a loved one, it is important to consider, not just feelings, satisfactions and good things in the relationship, since living together on an everyday basis inclines to highlight (in ways just dating and casual love does not) bad habits, bad manners, bad moods, and finally the most important factor - boredom. Few, if you may imagine, can be thrilling and exciting, new and wonderful but not all of them. I don't understand why people who are in deep love "just want to live together." Is not the living daily together the toughest part of a relationship or marriage? Does not living apart, even though seeing each other everyday or most of the time, allow some privacy, some ignition and some recuperation from all the time together?

I think it's pretty easy to become attracted romantically to other people but we should not expect that relationship to flower with the sweet smell of success just because of those feelings. I believe that one can relish the feelings of love without even telling the person we love. It's better that way. Isn't it better not to own and be responsible for someone? Was it not feasible if one could tell the other they are attracted to, either intellectually, sexually, romantically, however, about their love and stay smitten by them or to them without thereby seeking or needing to become lovers or have a fuller relationship? The trouble only begins if one freezes one's life expectations or let it ruin because one wants to act unsuitable so as to tamper those feelings or would like them returned. The irony is that the other person might be very pleased and satisfied just to know that you care about them, as long as neither of you behave unreasonably or have unreasonable expectations or demands just because of the attraction.

As we grow older, we may remember more of those fairy tales. Loved ones would leave us, friends and acquaintances would surprise us by appearing again, and those respected tales meant for fairies we imagined as young children of this earthly world may disappear one by one.

Tagged

Well this is my first tag after I crashed into the blog world and made quite a good number of friends. I find myself among intellectuals who I admit have altered how I view life. I was tagged by Nimmy and she told me to add up 10 songs - few from my mother tounge and maybe one another language, preferably Hindi. I did comment her that I may add up all the four languages that I listen to. So here they are. Enjoy!!

Malayalam

* Ponnum Thinkal Pottum
* Akale - Title Song
* Oru Raathri Koodi - Summer In Bethlahem
* Thenum Vayambum
* Thamarakkili Paadunnu - Moonampakkam
* Poomkaate Poyi Chollamo - Shyama
* Chandana Katte - Bheeshmacharya
* Pularkala Sundhara Swapnathil Njan Oru
* Poomaaname - Nirakoottu
* Chembarathi Poove Chollu
* Aayiram Kannumaayi - Nokketha Dhoorathu Kan


Tamil

* Uyirai Tholaithen
* Kadhal Konden
* Partha Mudhal Naal
* Munbe Vaa - Sillunu Oru Kadhal
* Ennai Konjam - Kakka Kakka
* Ennai Kaanavilaiyeh - Kadhal Desam
* Kaadhal Rojave - Roja
* Mudhinam Paarthene - Vaaranam Aayiram
* Kangal Irandal - Subramaniapuram


Hindi

* Dil De Diya Hai - Masti
* Awarapan Banjarapan
* Sheesha Ho Ya Dil Ho
* Akhion Kay Jorokhoon Say
* Tu is Tarah Se Meri Zindagi Mein
* Pal Pal Dil Ke Paas - Blackmail
* Likhe Jo Khat Tujhe - Kanyadaan
* Aur is Dil Mein Kya Rakha Hai - Immandaar
* Tumse Milke
* Dil Mera Churaya Kyun - Akele Hum Akele Tum
* Maine Dil se Kaha Dhund Lana Na Kushi


English

* Have I told you lately that I love you - Rod Stewart
* Because I love you - Shakin Stevens
* Unchained Melody - Righteous Brothers
* Making love out of nothing at all - Air Supply
* The Power of Love - Jennifer Rush
* Karma Chameleon - Boy George - Culture Club
* Broken Wings - Mr. Mister
* Hazard - Richard Marx
* I believe I can Fly - R. kelly
* Tonight I celeberate my love - Peabo Bryson and Roberta Flack
* Sealed with a kiss - Jason Donavan
* Waiting for a girl like you
* Those were the days - Mary Hopkin
* 500 Miles - The Brother Four

The Rape of the Women's Morality by Charles Darwin

Something shocking transpired in Kerala which didn't touch the media antennas nor did it touch the sentiments of the society too much. A two-and half-year old baby girl was quietly taken away from her destitute mother sleeping near a bus shelter in Kozhikode, a growing metropolis in north Kerala. She was found the next day raped with blood secretion from the vagina and injury on her lips. A two-and-half year old baby! Just a two-and-half year girl!! I know that nothing will happen here because the media and the feminists are very busy preparing for the big day. The day in history where they will take the next great leap in women empowerment. They are busy collecting "Pink Chaddis," rehearsing their say on the atrocities by a few goons who disrupted their pub going culture and planning their schedules for a romantic Valentine's Day. I guess the poor destitute souls simply don't have a voter ID and are not simply part of a vehement society that Charles Darwin has created for us. The minds of the people have been drilled in believing that fear of rape is not all about “rape” in the ordinary Physical and sexual sense but it includes all other circumstances where men feel like dominating and reigning women, and using his gender as an advantage to overpower her.

Women look suspiciously at every male trying to be friendly with them on the street. They don't even venture out in the streets alone in the fear that men will rape them. In 98.28 per cent of 581 rape cases registered last year, the "rape" accused were known to the victims and had been interacting with the victims in the normal course of life. It has to be understood by women that "men" don't rape women the minute they see them. The more women try to be afraid of men the more they are being targeted as weaklings. What makes them weaklings when they too have sharp teeth, hard knuckles, lethal elbows and powerful knee joints? What makes it difficult for them to use any one of them when they are being raped? Why do they need to cry out for help and waste the energy and stamina to ward off men in a typical rape scenario? The pervert in me stood to wonder why the "'Man" with an overly excited bulge in his loins did not attack and rub in his masculinity in the nearby sleeping dog? Did it fear the sharp claws of his agile legs?" Did he fear the tart teeth on his precious maleness? Women, I believe should rise up their horizons and bolt out their inhibitions which the society has created for them. The "Amnesia" bar scenario is no exception; it begs me to question why the women didn't call the police and go back to the pub to have their drink? A thought to be considered! Were they afraid that they were not part of the secular and constitutional India? Were they afraid of "Men?" Were they afraid of the media who would label them "Anti Hindu?" or "Anti Indian?"

As we celebrate the Charles Darwin anniversary, a total hypocrite to the extent that he was instrumental in creating the concept called feminism. He invited the wrath, belief and the convictions among a gender which I believe is no inferior and helpless than the so called "Man" he wanted to be called. He hard scripted beliefs in an innocent society and declared that, (Quote) "‘women… constant companion, (friend in old age) who will feel interested in one, object to be beloved and played with—better than a dog anyhow—Home, and someone to take care of house—Charms of music and female chit-chat. These things good for one’s health"

Before his marriage to his own cousin and fathering 10 children he wrote that, "how should I manage all my business if I were obligated to go every day walking with my wife—Eheu!’ As a married man I would be a ‘poor slave … worse than a Negro’ and then reminisced that ‘One cannot live this solitary life, with groggy old age, friendless and cold and childless staring one in one’s face …’


The weaker gender as imposed by Charles Darwin got imposed in the society to the extent that Women have always been presented in literature and even in mythology that characterizes the thinking of groups, societies and nation as submissive and passive, a weakling to the core. Even though the last past years have seen striking increases in the quad usable for women in the Indian society and women in general with the help of affirmative policies and programmers by the government and revolting initiatives by feminists and NGOs the impact has been considerate but not enough to change the views of "men" in general that women is a human after all.

For an ultimate revelation, biologically the women are a stronger sex. In societies around the world the women when treated equally to men have outlived men, and hence there are more women than men in the world. But reverse is the case in India with the census proving that there are fewer women for men in India with the sole exception of Kerala. Every other State had fewer women than men accounting to foetal homicide and dowry issues

Women need to stand up dusting off the age old beliefs of the society and "Darwinism" and emerge strong and confident individuals, in total control of their own lives and able to raise their voices to demand their rightful existence and presence in this world. They are instead asking themselves if the glass is half full or half empty.

Though I'm concerned about all the women in the world in general, I believe that women in India are a deprived lot in terms of personal space and freedom. The India's total female population of India is more than the cumulative populations of Canada, USA and the Russia but still women are afraid to walk the high bridge and show the world that they are no lesser animals. Why were they opposed by the society in encouraging remarriage, supporting female education, and opposing polygamy in the older days? Why are they still to a few exceptions due to globalization coerced to wearing purdahs and hijabs? Why are they still forced to sell their morality and bodies for money to satisfy the male pleasures?


The untoward female to male ratio can be explicated by the fact that women in India are still second class citizens. It is cogent evidence that, at every stage in their lives starting from their gory births the women in general are deprived of their rights and entitlements, and singled out in a variety of ways. Who could forget the legendary Travancore (kingdom of Kerala) decision to impose tax on women for the right to cover their upper body? Who could forget that the Women had no legal or social status rights other than that educed from their stand in the family and could not inherit, except for the poor widow who was esteemed to 'use' her husband's property if there were no male heir, and had few options to support themselves? Who can forget sati? Who could forget that in the past golden era, women were just literary subjects in whom the Vishnu cult fathered narrations, the Ramayana and stories of Krishna devotional songs, with courtly love as a trope, which sported women as heroines and just simple objects and entertainments of desire?

I hated Charles Darwin when I read in his famous research and writings that, "A wife did not aspire to be her husband’s intellectual companion, but rather to amuse his leisure hours." The
The Charles Darwin's "Darwinian" principles of male superiority assisted to increase the secularization and divisions in society

From time immemorial the doctrines and convictions dictated and transferred to boys and girls in the family have created gender differences. Of course I believe that that these are not all mutually undivided singled theories and are innate but are reinforced and exaggerated by the likes of Charles Darwin whose birthday we are very joyously celebrating!!

The Valentine Blues

I got a conscience wake up call today when I heard the "new terrorists of India" a newly sprouted political gang named Shiv Ram Sena who I hate to publicize but have to cite and question their point of view. They reportedly held a press conference to announce that they would be patrolling the streets, armed with "mangalsutra" (bridal necklace). They announced, “If we come across couples being together in public and expressing their love we will take them to the nearest temple and conduct their marriage."

I wonder if they have no other job. Are they all living in a stinky deep shit well to realize that not everyone gets married with a “mangalsutra?” How are they going to assume who is a Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist or a Jain? And since when did they assume the role of our Parents? I would like to remind them some other duties a regular parent does so that they can exorcise them…

1: Restrict easy availability of cheap pornographic material in the forms of books, porn sites in the internet and MMS's
2: Go for legal fights with media and Bollywood for stupid indicatory pelvic dances and suggestive advertisements
3: Fight the drug lobby for easily available drugs

I'm limiting this to only three so that they can easily achieve their goals before the elections and become the new guardians of India.


Have they thought deeply enough about their norms and actions being sensible? Do they know that Valentine's Day is not just celebrated between lovers? Do they know that there are at least 9-10 different flowers given off in a typical Valentine's Day? Let us educate them least they marry off even friends, brothers and relatives

Red Roses: Symbolically red roses convey romantic love and enduring passion. This is the perfect flower to say, "I Love You," (Just read: I love you and we will marry if we like each others attitudes and if our "Parents" agree).

White Roses: Symbolic of purity, truth, innocence and respect

Yellow Roses: Symbolizes friendship and celebration. Used to convey "Let's Be Friends," (Read: Let's be friends and not, "let's wait for Ram Sena to get us married")

Pink Roses: Symbolize admiration, gentleness and sweetness and are associated with friendship (Hope you are not color blind and can sense the difference between "Red" and "Pink"

(Note for the Ram Sena: Any other color, just ignore the couple, you may not understand the depth of human relations)


Let's agree with one point for them, celebrating Valentine's Day is a Western tradition, absolutely no doubt, but in this era of globalization (hope they have gone to school and have heard of it), it has come to be a celebration for men and women around the world. Do they know that the modern Indian morality is a direct result of a variety of historical events?

Let's educate them before the elections: (Source: Wikipedia)


Harappan culture: Paleolithic Age, roughly between 400,000 and 200,000 B.C

Vedic Aryans: A series of migrations by Indo-European-speaking seminomads took place during the second millennium B.C

Kingdoms and Empires: The Aryan and Greek penetration between 1500 and ca. 800 B.C. A two-way cultural fusion between Indo-Greek communities, especially in art and architecture

The Mauryan Empire: Emergence of Magadha in the eastern Indo-Gangetic Plain. In 322 B.C., Magadha, under the rule of Chandragupta Maurya. Ashoka, grandson of Chandragupta, ruled from 269 to 232 B.C. Disintegration of the Mauryan Empire India's unguarded borders again attract a series of invaders between 200 B.C. and A.D. 300. As the Aryans had done, the invaders became "Indianized" in the process of their conquest and settlement.

The Deccan and the South: Cheras, Cholas and the Pandyas frequently fought to gain regional and cultural supremacy.

Gupta and Harsha: The military exploits of the first three rulers, Chandragupta I (ca. 319-335), Samudragupta (ca. 335-376), and Chandragupta II (ca. 376-415) in North India

The Southern Rivals: Peninsular India involved in an eighth-century tripartite power struggle among the Chalukyas (556-757) of Vatapi, the Pallavas (300-888) of Kanchipuram, and the Pandyas (seventh through the tenth centuries) of Madurai. The Chalukya rulers were overthrown by their subordinates, the Rashtrakutas, who ruled from 753 to 973.

The Plunders: Mahmud of Ghazni (971-1030), who was also known as the "Sword of Islam," mounted seventeen plundering expeditions between 997 and 1027. The sultanate was in constant state of uncertainty as more than five dynasties rose and fell.

The Mughals (1398- 1707): In the early sixteenth century, descendants of the Mongol, Turkish, Iranian, and Afghan invaders of South Asia - Mughals invaded and spread their traditions

The Marathas: They were left virtually alone before the invading Afghan forces, headed by Ahmad Shah Abdali (later called Ahmad Shah Durrani), who routed them on the blood-drenched battlefield at Panipat in 1761

The Coming of the Europeans: Portuguese, Dutch, British, and French

The British Empire :( 1757-1947) - Diffused with ample ethnocentric sense of superiority, British intellectuals crashed through a movement that brought Western intellectual and technological innovations to Indians. There mission was to "civilize" India and rule it until Indians proved themselves competent for self-rule. Western-educated Hindu's assayed to rid Hinduism of its much criticized social dilemmas like idolatry, the caste systems, child marriages, and sati.


Now its question time for the Ram Sena before the bell rings and we disperse the class -

Whose tradition are you following? The Harappans, the Vedic Aryans, the Greeks, the Mauryans, the Mughals, the Invaders from the Mongol, Iran and Afghan or the Marathas?

Does not every society celebrate love and desire? What would be there without love and desire? Is the Ram Sena uncomfortable with the great Indian and Hindu poet - Kalidasa who historied about the human torso, desire, passion, sex, courtly love and companionship? Are they ashamed of Lord Krishna, who typified youthful love, desire and attraction? Do they deny that "The Kama Sutra" which is a Hindu treatise on love and sex was not, "Made in India?" Do they believe that the elaborate sexual activity portrayed in stone in Khajuraho was dropped by the UFO's? Was the Hindu festival of Holi which is also an Indian version of celebrating love introduced by the Aryans, Dravidians, Mauryans or the Marathas?

Do not India's ethnic culture, the varying linguistics, and regional complexness set it apart from other countries as an ultimate world civilization, secular and varied in all aspects?

Have not great philosophers such as Immanuel Kant pointed out that, "Love in the ordinary sense of the word cannot be commanded, because issues relating to feelings or emotions are not relevant to moral commands?" Were you not young once with feelings of love, the need to copulate and be wanted in love?

Trust me, Ram Sena, when I say that there was a golden time when one celebrated love in India openly and without inhibitions and the rulers protected it. If you don't want to support just protect it by being a silent bodyguard for the couple while they dream away with their hands enticed and remind them in the evening that it's dark, safely escort and drop them back in their homes and wish them good night and good luck. If "Goondas" like you simply don't have this helping mentality and culture then go to sleep like the Rip Van Winkle and wake up 20 years later to see the 20 year old young generation of the very couples you are very vehemently trying to pull apart in the name of God!

As for me, I'm very much energized by your attitude. I'm going to order for around 100 "red flowers," open up a small temporary shack behind St Theresa's College in Kochi, Kerala, where I'll distribute it between 10 A.M to 12:00 noon, freely to any couple who wants to propose in front of me and be reminded that I'll be there with at least 100 of my friends waiting for you to disrupt them. God created butts soft not just to be comfortable on political chairs but also to be kicked in the ass publicly by people like me. Best of luck and see you there!!

Run Mama Run - Delusional Suspicions

This is a story of two couples who messed up their lives. This is the story of two very educated couples who dreamt a home and a family. This is the story of millions of men and women who loose the faith, the trust and the hope of living together everyday. This is the story of agony, loneliness and fear. This is the story of revenge and delusional suspicion.

Vijayasree Voora married Dr. V Ravi Chandran a scientist in the USA. Vijayasree purportedly did her education from the University of Hawaii at Manoa (1993 to 1995) and the Purdue University (1995 - 1999). Being well educated she worked as a lecturer. The couple borne a child named Aditya. Everything seemed fine until one day the ugly face of egoism showed its face. They decided to divorce but now what about Aditya. The custodial battle in USA was swift and according to very stringent laws in the USA, Chandra was almost made to rake out $ 3,00,000 (Rs 1.5 crore) as an one-time settlement and he was ordered to pay $ 2,500 (Rs 1.2 lakh) per month as maintenance for the child every month. Aditya was allowed custodial of 20 days with his mother and the remaining 10 days with Chandran. Soon Chandran wanted Aditya only for himself and wanted to deny him to his biological Mother. He filed for legal custody by claiming that Vijayasree is mentally disturbed. She in turn accused him of being a pedophile and sexually molesting Aditya. The court but directs Aditya to his Father. Vijayasree requests a month of stay with her child before he goes for ever to live with his father and also requests for a journey with him to India so that Aditya could visit his grand parents and relatives for the last time. She journeys but never returns back to the USA. Dr. Ravi files a complaint for kidnapping and the court issues an arrest warrant in January 2007. Two years have gone by and the Mother is still running and evading an international manhunt.

What makes human beings delusional and suspicious? Why do people disturb their family life by creating illusory ideas? Why do egoist couples make repeated accusations based on insignificant or minimal evidence, often citing apparently normal or everyday events or duties to back up their claim? They also take great pains to test their partner's claim and go to such large lengths to monitor the partner’s behavior and everyday movements, sometimes to great extremes, such as waiting outside the partner's office, checking their incoming phone calls or checking their emails

In most cases of the current child custody drama, the court favors the mother. After all, children do need their mothers particularly at an early age. And this is not to discredit Mothers but I strongly believe Fathers too are significant in a young child's life. When the child custody becomes a conflict and battle, everyone loses on the way to some ego victory - Innocent children, the couple’s future and the whole family's peace. Children need the love of both parents and should never be asked to choose between the two most important people in their lives

On the 2nd anniversary of the escapade, I mull over about their torn lives and remember the story of the wise Solomon who was adjudicating the trail of two mothers who were claiming the ownership of a baby. Both the mothers argued that the baby was their baby. The wise King ordered the baby to be cut in half and each mother receives half the baby. One mother screamed and pleaded the king not to hurt the baby and to give the baby to the other woman. The king thus knew that the woman who cared for her baby was the real parent.

But seeing the manhunt initiated by Dr. Chandra who has even created a website http://www.rescueaditya.org and the way the biological Mother is termed an "International Kidnapper," posted and portrayed as a "severely mentally disturbed" person and some "petty and daily" Mother struggles in bringing up a child posted as video leaves no confusion in my mind that Dr Ravi is the disturbed person. His stupid logic quoted from the website says, "Aditya lived like a prince in father's home while Vijayasree Voora made him a street urchin and gave him a lifestyle of a filthy beggar." is too much to fathom. I just wish that Vijayasree keeps running until her husband understands his folly, gives the respect he needs to give his wife and welcomes them both back with love and an understanding which God imparted to only us mortals.